I woke up this morning on the three year anniversary of getting Bells Palsy, and my face still didn’t work. On one hand, three years later it’s no big deal—I am who I am and there isn’t much to do about it. On the other hand—my face doesn’t work!!!!!
Actually it works a little. I’d say that I healed about 50% and then stopped. Oddly, my daughter who was very tuned into the Bells Palsy in the beginning remarked recently that I am fully healed. Perception is a fascinating thing.
Three years later, I still think that everyone is looking at my lopsided mouth and unmoving eyebrow. Or I think everyone notices the odd tearing that happens as soon as I begin eating. Food makes me so happy but you wouldn’t know it to watch me cry my way through a meal. And yet, I know people aren’t lying when Bells Palsy comes up and they say they never noticed.
I definitely notice the tics that have developed over time. My eye is way more blinkly and my mouth moves sometimes without being asked. I have developed traits that I never judged others for having yet look on myself harshly every time I blink a few times rapidly.
Yesterday was Father’s Day and I had the most wonderful day possible. Breakfast with the family after a long walk with the dog, the morning passed working on school project with my daughter ( a very cool board game she is designing called Animal Escape), and spent the afternoon in Prospect Park before coming home for a lovely dinner of sloppy joe chicken tacos. What could be better than that?
I guess it would be better if my face worked like it once did but since it doesn’t, I will just keep on being me.